the life of a hopeless romantic.

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"You lose someone and you never really are the same after that. I remember the day I lost her and the first selfish thought that came to my mind was, now I won’t have anyone to kiss me goodnight. As the years pass, you learn that losing someone soon becomes selfless rather than selfish. I’ve learned that losing her changed me as a person, it made me realize that my life is nothing without her in it. You become immune to love and you wonder why it ever failed with the one person you would have asked to be your wife. I remember how I felt the day I lost her, and sadly it’s more painful today than it was 4 years ago. I hear about her through friends and I see her pictures on social media. She is succeeding and happy with her life and there’s nothing I can do about it. I want to reach for her tell her I’m so proud of her. I want to be the one to give her hugs on days when she feels like giving up and I want to be the one to give her congratulation kisses when she’s in her triumphs. I want to be the one she comes running to when she’s happy, when she’s sad, when she just wants someone to love. You lose someone and you’re never really the same. I use be selfish and wonder how I could survive without her but now, now I’m selfless because all I care about is her. Her, her, her, I worry in the dark of the night and wonder if she could hear my thoughts from miles away. I want her to know that my chest hurts when her heart aches; I want her to know that she is the one regret in life. I don’t regret our love but I regret losing her and not fighting for her when I should have. You know, you lose someone and you’re never really the same after that because when she walks away, she walks away for good. She leaves a bit stronger because she now has a piece of you, a piece of you that you’ll never get back; a piece of you that will remind her not to fall in love with just another selfish idiot."
If only I was who I am now, then maybe she would have stayed (via h0pefulkid-withaninkedupheart)
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"I wish someone would have warned me that when you fall in love, you give a piece of your heart that you’ll never get back, no matter how many nights I scream your name into my pillow until my throat is raw and my eyes sting. I wish someone would have warned me that I would avoid going certain places again simply because it would remind me of you too much. I wish someone would have warned me that it’s so easy to lose yourself when you’re busy chasing someone else. I wish someone would have warned me that time can only heal what you’re willing to let it. I wish someone would have warned me that I can’t lose what was never mine."
So here’s my warning to you (via bitchin-brandi)
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"oh god you’re beautiful
I wish I could kiss
the sad out of you
I wish I could look
in the eyes of yours
moonlight blue
or like a
forrest full of moss
your lips
are like rose petals
and your voice
sounds like velvet feels
I remember
when you told me this
you wanted me
and I wanted someone else
I can only imagine
the pain in your chest
as the same as I have now
aching bodies, and bleeding hearts
i’m sorry
I never fell for you
and I don’t know
if it makes you feel better
if I tell you that
I wish I had"
i’m sorry I never fell for you  (via thisporcelainworld)
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"Hold her.
Just fucking hold her.
Hold her hands so fucking tight you think your skin would merge together.
Hold her hands tight while you still can because three months later after you’ve already left she won’t remember what it felt like to kiss you,
or what it felt like to make love to you,
but she will wake up tracing the places your thumb touched her arms,
and her shoulders,
and her back,
and her ribs,
and her thighs,
and she will clasp her hands together and hold them against her chest because
maybe she will never fall in love with someone who held her like they held the entire universe in their hands,
and maybe she will find many people who will kiss her softer, harder, slower, faster, better
than you ever did but she will never get rid of how empty her hands feel
when they’re not curled around yours
and maybe that’s the saddest part
of losing you."
A Story A Day #3 by r.b (via rbcages)
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"Nothing is more beautiful than a smile that has struggled through tears"
Unknown (via kushandwizdom)

More good vibes here

(via thelovenotebook)
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